Nobody Warned US

In this video, we share our honest experience with menopause symptoms like hot flashes, frequent urination, and vision changes. Nobody warned us about these changes, so we're here to talk about it openly and offer some tips for managing these symptoms.

Nobody Warned Us About Menopause: It’s More Than Hot Flashes is the brutally honest, laugh-out-loud series that spills the real tea on menopause—the good, the bad, and the downright sweaty. Everyone talks about hot flashes like they’re the worst part, but what about the brain fog that makes you forget why you walked into a room? Or the mood swings that have you crying over a dog food commercial one minute and ready to fight your mailman the next?

This series dives into all the things they should have warned us about—like waking up at 3 AM for no reason, suddenly needing a fan in every room, or realizing your sex drive has either disappeared completely or turned into a raging teenager. With hilarious personal stories, expert advice, and real talk about everything from weight gain to weird body changes, Nobody Warned Us About Menopause is your survival guide to this wild ride.

So, grab a cold drink (because, let’s be real, you’re probably overheating right now), and join us as we laugh, vent, and figure this menopause thing out together. Because if we don’t laugh about it, we might just start crying again!

Transcript

Intimate Confessions & Body Changes

Speaker 1 0:00

But you remember when you used to wet the whole bed. When did that stop?

Speaker 2 0:07

When did that stop? I think it depends on the person. Honestly, he's still young.

Speaker 1 0:12

See, you're still messing with the women that still wet up the whole bed. When did that stop and what happened?

Speaker 2 0:17

to it the right person had you?

Speaker 1 0:19

No, the right person will, but if you just looked at this, Look at me Now.

Speaker 2 0:30

you had the man like trying to comment.

Speaker 1 0:31

Can I try it out? It was more than just a flat. No, it was hot. It was hot because it scared him for a minute.

Speaker 3 0:44

This is Legra. This is Stephanie.

Speaker 2 0:45

This is Cherie and this is Legra. This is Stephanie. This is Cherie.

Speaker 3 0:54

And this is Ivanya, and this is Timeless and Unfiltered where we are spilling the tea on midlife one laugh at a time. Welcome to another episode of Timeless and Unfiltered I, I'm stephanie, I'm sharice and I'm ivania, and we would like you to like, follow and subscribe.

Speaker 2 1:13

click that button we don't know where to put the button somewhere on the screen like follow and subscribe thank you, thank you, thank, because we're going to spill the tea on midlife.

Speaker 1 1:26

One laugh at a time One laugh at a time. Well, let's jump right in. Let's talk about things you wish somebody had told us about or warned us about, this stage of life, about midlife. I'm going to start with my vision. Let's just start with that.

Speaker 4 1:42

I didn't know.

Speaker 1 1:43

I wouldn't be able to see. I love to read and I don't read very often because even with glasses it's hard to see and I don't know when I stopped being able to read the pill bottle, I know. Or if I'm cooking something in the kitchen, trying to read. I don't read as much, but it's my vision.

Speaker 3 2:01

Yeah, I think that's dark. I don't know when it starts.

Speaker 3 2:05

I had went and got lasik because I couldn't see far away I think, just nearsighted I couldn't see far away and I think at the time I was like 30, 35, 36 and the doctor was like oh, you're approaching 40, you might want to go get an eye for reading. I might need no reading eye and I thought I was gonna have like mismatched eyes. I was thinking real stupid and he was like, no, as you approach 40, your eye loses this elasticity oh, he was like you're gonna need reading glasses.

Speaker 3 2:34

Everyone is, and I'm like, man, I'm good, I'm good. Oh man, I so wish I did it, because now I'm back to wearing glasses. I had a surgery so I wouldn't need glasses, and now I'm right back wearing glasses because I didn't get the um eye for reading and then I could have got.

Speaker 1 2:50

You could have gotten the distance. Yeah, one eye for reading.

Speaker 3 2:54

That's what Kyra did, so she waited like five years after my lacing. She's like you, you ain't going blind and nothing over there, are you? And I was like no girl. I'm about to go get the. Uh, the, the, the surgery and she doesn't have to wear reading glasses because she went and I was like oh man, so you can't, you can't have it redone. No, he said, once they do it.

Speaker 2 3:14

I can't come back and have it done, but check and see, because there's new stuff out there, because I saw another doctor that says they do different types of surgery. I couldn't tell you what they're called because I had LASIK also and I'm to the point where I'm about to start needing readers, and I don't want to.

Speaker 3 3:27

So I'm going to check it out. Let me know if you get to it before I do, because I don't like glasses.

Speaker 2 3:33

Glasses give me headaches, they press me.

Speaker 3 3:36

They make this little thing.

Speaker 2 3:37

When they don't, they'll go right back to having that I got rid of that now they may have changed technology now so you may be able to get another surgery.

Speaker 1 3:46

Because I'm waiting for mine. No one told me about the vision. What about you? No one told you about it that I'm going to have to pee more or can't hold it Can't hold it.

Speaker 2 3:57

As a kid, my mom said don't hold your pee, just go to the bathroom. I'm going to hold mine. I'm going to pee all day. I hate waking up in the middle of the night. Use the bathroom, that's one thing. I just oh my god, hold it, then you have the pee dream like am I in the bathroom?

Speaker 5 4:14

the pee.

Speaker 2 4:14

Dream like I'm. I'm in the bathroom but nothing's coming out, and it's like my body tell me don't pee in this bed like get up and go to the bathroom. I'm like it's just not coming, I coming to campaign.

Speaker 3 4:25

I've never had a dream because you lazy and subconsciously your brain is like bitch you gotta pee get up, go to, but you don't want to get up and pee. So then now it's like in your dream you gotta pee.

Speaker 1 4:38

You need to get up and pee. It's a pee dream. Yeah, I haven't had a pee dream well, I didn't know if that's what's called.

Speaker 3 4:47

That's why I call it the pd or that when you start getting older, um and if you have any type of bladder inconsistencies, if you, if I sneeze, oh that one. If you're a little squirt of piss, yeah, so you're pissing, yeah no, and I'm working out if I'm choking and coughing, oh my.

Speaker 2 5:06

If I'm jumping, if I do jumping jacks, yeah, you're like ha yeah, no one warned me. Nobody told me about that one.

Speaker 3 5:12

I wasn't warned and I know it don't happen to everybody.

Vision Problems in Midlife

Speaker 2 5:14

Yeah, that happens.

Speaker 3 5:16

No, but my doctor OBGYN says it's very common.

Speaker 1 5:19

I mean, sure it is. I'm just glad I hadn't got that yet, or hopefully I don't get that.

Speaker 4 5:25

But, if you do Kegels, sometimes it could pull Kegels.

Speaker 2 5:28

Yeah so they say sit down do it. You got to do a lot. Just the thought that you were sitting there flexing on the couch. Yeah the noni egg, you do the egg.

Speaker 1 5:41

No, I just I barely Kegel if she watches this, but it's still funny to me to this day. She was, you know, when they they do the kegel eggs and they have like the glass ones. Yeah, she, she had a glass egg and she was you know, she does it when you're chilling around the house or whatever, and she's chilling around the house. She got her egg in. Well, she got company and she forgot the egg was in. Oh yeah, she forgot the egg was in and you know, you know they start messing around a little bit or whatever. And she remembered the egg and was like um, wait, hold on a second and pop the egg.

Speaker 4 6:16

She didn't tell him that she had it in there.

Speaker 1 6:22

She said it was some fluids on the egg and stuff and at first it freaked him out and then he got excited about it Go to hell you pop an egg.

Speaker 2 6:32

What else can you do? What other tricks you got?

Speaker 1 6:34

I still remember when she called to tell me that I said you did what she said, girl, I just was like wait, hold on, and popped the egg out. But yeah, but she said it really helps with kegels and stuff to build your bladder, your pelvic floor, really, yeah, your pelvic floor because that's what it is whatever exercise you can do, ladies, please don't but yeah, I haven't had the the sneeze and I can't hold it like I used to.

Speaker 1 7:01

Yeah, so if I say, oh, I gotta pee, it can wait, just no, it can't let me go and go to yeah.

Speaker 4 7:05

So if I say, oh, I got to pee.

Speaker 3 7:06

It can wait, just go. No, it can't. Let me go and go to the bathroom. See, I'm a camel. I can hold mine forever. That's the one thing I can do Unless you sneeze, unless I sneeze, I'll be like oh shit, oh my God, and I went to the doctor and I walk around smelling like little pissy so he didn't know he was like I don't know girl. Yes, he looked like prince. He's so little and petite and cute and so when he left the nurse she's a woman of our age.

Speaker 3 7:33

She's like that's because we're not emptying our bladder fully so she said, when you go to the bathroom and pee, she said because you always have maybe like two or three drops that you didn't get out so she was like you lean forward and squeeze. I do that them and see I I didn't know that and she said that's why you'll smell pee. And she said because you might have two, two to three little drops left that you didn't get out. So she said lean over and squeeze. And she said you hear them little things yeah, you do and then, you'll be fine.

Speaker 3 8:01

I was like nobody. I never know, I never heard that.

Speaker 2 8:03

Well, I've never heard that. Yeah, I do Every time that I use the bathroom.

Speaker 1 8:06

when I finish, I lean forward, yeah.

Speaker 3 8:08

And almost do a Kegel exercise.

Speaker 2 8:13

Yeah, I was going to say in Swedish and that last little two, three drops come out, I'm like yep, now I'm done, so you walk around smelling fresh all day.

Bladder Issues & Pee Dreams

Speaker 1 8:19

Sometimes you say the random farts, okay, nobody told. Well, I think part of it is because things you used to be able to eat you can't eat anymore. You're not eating as much Like you know, even us, we had lunch earlier today. I had to run upstairs and go to the bathroom Like what is my body doing?

Speaker 1 8:38

Something I ate said nope, uh-uh, ma'am, you don't know that, uh-uh, ma no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no no.

Speaker 3 8:50

No no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's just health issues. You have to just get it all out. You don't want to have digestive.

Speaker 1 9:04

Well, you already know, one of my biggest ones too, is the hot flashes. But I used to see women have hot flashes. But I think until you start to have them, you don't understand it, you don't get it. So the hot flashes, as I'm sitting here right now with our fifth co-host, the fan. But it's even worse I haven't slept. I haven't slept probably in over a year where I can say I've slept through the night, and probably over a year. Why does it keep you from sleeping? Because I have hot flashes during my sleep, and so I'm sleep.

Speaker 1 9:38

I gotta get out of the covers because I'm hot. Now I'm freezing.

Speaker 2 9:42

I gotta put.

Speaker 1 9:42

I probably take my covers on and off a good 10 to 15 times every night. I haven't had a full night's sleep in probably at least over a year. I don't sleep, which is why, when the morning comes now, you're exhausted so you pass out and fall asleep and you need to get up. I got work to do. I don't have time to sleep till 10, 11 o'clock. I'm exhausted. I haven't slept all night.

Speaker 2 10:08

What causes them? Do we know what causes them? I have night sweats, real bad Night sweats. I'm like kicking my leg out trying to get in.

Speaker 3 10:15

Put that one leg out, I wake up and that's why he be like you just be stripping.

Speaker 1 10:31

You be butt naked naked. Then you're like I'm cool, but you know that's estrogen covers up, that's your estrogen. You need to have your estrogen tested. Um, but the moment I'm clear medically for estrogen, that's the first thing, the first thing I will be blind with bifocal zone, but my estrogen gonna be all right.

Speaker 1 10:38

I might not be able to see, but I'm going to get that estrogen because that you know, for me it's my quality of life. This man look all this because there's going to hair that estrogen, because for me it's my quality of life. This band look all this because there's growing a hair in my face. But I'm hot all the time. I'm tired of my underwear being wet.

Speaker 3 10:53

Like I am.

Speaker 1 10:54

So I will sit here soaking wet for no reason. And it's worse at night. It's worse at night. So you're burning up and you're freezing. You're burning up and you're freezing. I've been in Walmart damn near naked because I'm coming out my clothes, I'm coming out, and when they first started I didn't realize or recognize what it was, because I mean, you heard about it, but I'm having hot flashes. What is that? Literally, I was in Walmart in the checkout line. It was a long line behind me. Fortunately, my checkout lady was a little bit older lady. I was like I couldn't, and when it happens sometimes I can't hear you Because you're that hot, I'm so hot, I can't focus on what we're talking about right now. I got to solve this Right.

Speaker 4 11:39

You know what I'm saying so.

Speaker 1 11:40

I was in the checkout line and I had a major hot flash when they first started and I didn't really know what it was and everything and I was like I think I'm having a hot flash and the lady was like she just made her take your time, I can't, I can't check out right now because I can't focus on trying to give you my card Like I can't even. I'm barely I'm going to pass out and remember we were in Jamaica.

Speaker 2 12:03

I was going to say how did you survive Jamaica? Oh, no yeah.

Speaker 1 12:07

I kept going in and out the air condition but we went and when we had to go see Princess, I remember I almost fainted, oh Lord, because one I'm internally burning up and then I have the extra heat.

Speaker 1 12:22

So I've already told my doctor. And then mine are really bad because I'm One, your estrogen gets low. Now, before my diagnosis I was getting hormone therapy and the great thing about it is, when you get estrogen, your hot flashes will stop in 24 hours. You'll never have another one as long because your estrogen levels off. But because of the type of cancer I had, is estrogen driven. They're blocking my estrogen. So I'm on. I take a pill every night before I go to bed to block estrogen. So when I go to bed I'm in hell. I'm in hell. I'm in hell all day. So it's messing with my quality of life. So I told my doctor. And then they give you. Amazingly enough, they gave me Cymbalta, which is the depression medicine, and I was like well, why am I getting depression medicine? Well, you know, my little godson is a pharmacist. Why are they giving me?

Speaker 1 13:24

You know, so I had to ask someone and he said is something in the Cymbalta that's supposed to, because Cymbalta is for depression that's supposed to level off. It's for other stuff though, yeah, but it's supposed to, um, because cymbaltas for depression, that's supposed to level off.

Hot Flashes & Sleep Disruptions

Speaker 4 13:34

Yeah, but it's supposed to be for so many things it's supposed to level off my body temperature.

Speaker 1 13:39

So they're trying to find other methods than giving me estrogen. So but I already told them. Well, it didn't work, so they gave me something else, but I'm giving. I just started it, maybe about a week or two ago, and I told him once we I'm going to give it 60 days, but after 60 days.

Speaker 1 13:55

I'm coming off everything I'm not taking, I'm not taking the blocker, I'm not taking a single solitary thing, I quit. Oh god, you know, I, you know, could I got a double mastectomy to limit the risk? So now I can't sit around worried every day.

Speaker 4 14:20

I'm gonna have, I'm gonna get cancer.

Speaker 1 14:22

I'm gonna get cancer. Look, I tried your way. It's not working and it is really messing with my quality of life and for me, my life and joy is more important. So if I got a good ten years, if I got a good 10 years, if I got a good 20, I'm going out with a bang, but I ain't going to be sitting around here with hot flashes. I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't sleep. I'm exhausted, I'm tired. Nobody told you that hot flashes could be this severe. I didn't know it.

Speaker 1 14:55

I thought it was just going to be a little sweat on my forehead. This is going to take me down and I'm not doing it. So nobody told me hot flashes were this bad and I was going to walk around like the old lady with the fan everywhere, and then your joints.

Speaker 2 15:03

I think we didn't talk about our joints feeling hurting and not being able to drop it like we want to drop it anymore, but it happens overnight.

Speaker 1 15:12

It happens overnight, but even more so, even more than just the physical stuff, that happens um midlife. I know we were talking, or having that conversation, about people having to come out of retirement. Managing your money. Managing your money you think you have all the time in the world. You think about that 401k and for those of you that move jobs and you take your 401k or you cash out your 401k and then all of a sudden you look up, you're 55 years old and you don't have a retirement plan be a public working until you're 80.

Speaker 1 15:47

Yeah, you know and that's that's one of my fears is and. Sharisse, and I talk about this all the time too, Charisse. What don't we talk about? We talk about everything don't we, Because I've said it 10 times we talk about this all the time and shout out to all the people seniors that are working, customer service and stuff and the Walmarts, and we're not in Target right now, but you know, the fast food places are such a service job.

Speaker 1 16:15

Because a lot of them are there because they have to be there, not because they want to be, it's inflation. Not because they want to be, and my biggest fear is that I'm not ready for retirement. When it's time for me to sit down, I can't sit down, so I think that's one reason why, too, too, I also work so hard, because my clock is a ticking.

Speaker 2 16:35

I need money, yeah so I feel we make money, but we don't always save money because we always think, well, yeah, it'll be fine, like it's so far away.

Speaker 1 16:42

Retirement seems so far away, and now it's like I felt like I just celebrated my 50th birthday and then, all of a sudden, I went to sleep and took a nap. When I woke up, I was 55. Where did those five years go? Like they went by so fast. It was just new year's and now we're already in, or past first quarter of the year it's already gone um, I think another thing I heard you say something about was credit yeah, oh yeah, nobody told you about credit when you were younger.

Speaker 3 17:11

Yeah, and here are these credit cards. Here's a credit card To a point, but even with credit, you can have good credit and then something drastic happens in your life, like I got laid off like two times within two years and so now I'm like, oh, I can't pay my bills and my credit just went all the way down my life.

Speaker 2 17:34

So I'm having to start everything all over it because it took two seconds from my score to go to shit.

Speaker 3 17:37

Right, it's gonna take forever to build it back up and I'm just like, oh my god. So yeah, I I don't know what more you can know about credit. You know credit to get you in certain doors and in certain rooms, through certain doors and in certain rooms, but if something happens, unless you just have a shitload of money saved, yeah, this just goes into credit and money and we're living day to day and taking care of our adult kids, trying to help them out and do all this, and that's why I was like, yeah, I can't do nothing for nobody, because helping you guys out my savings weren't what they needed to be and thank god, I was able to make it through all of the layoffs or whatever. Thank you, jesus. But it's like, yeah, yeah, we build everything at 50.

Speaker 3 18:18

I'm starting over, so right and that's so scary. It is, that's so scary, I'm scared to death like this is terrible and that's why I'm sitting here like do I sell my house, do I? What do I do like it's just because I feel like my house is like money in the bank. But I want to pull money out of my house, but they're like, oh, your score is just not that and I'm like what the fuck?

Speaker 4 18:37

so I like this is just uh terrible but, one day at a time, but it's scary it is, it's very scary um.

Speaker 1 18:48

My mother was an entrepreneur but my mother didn't know about business credit. I wish I had learned about business credit at an earlier age.

Speaker 1 19:00

I know about it now the importance of it and I have business credit and, and and I'm still learning a little bit, but being able to maneuver with business credit and the options and the what it gives you, you know, to be able to change, because you can really change your life through the use of business credit. But I wish I had have known this years ago, because I've been an entrepreneur for years but never knew. That's just like those people, like you have those 800 credit scores, what y'all doing with it.

Speaker 2 19:31

What are?

Speaker 1 19:31

bless you. What are you doing with it? Just having?

Speaker 2 19:34

it. What's the point of?

Speaker 1 19:34

having it if it's not if you haven't learned what it does, what it could do for you. So you know, we used to have a friend who always bragged about it.

Speaker 5 19:43

I was just going to say that Go ahead, I'll let you say it 800 credit score yeah, just to say it Didn't invest, didn't do anything Like you could have made that work for you, and they just didn't. It was just the ideal of it for them.

Speaker 1 20:00

Yeah like nobody warned me that I might have to retire and then come back out of retirement. Nobody want to go through that, right. But if you learn how to use credit, if you learn how to use your business credit, your 401ks, like you just said, you lost your job in a two-year period twice, yes, twice, and having to rebuild. But if you have that nest egg, the importance of entrepreneurship there's so many different things Like I wish we just had got that, just a just a little bit sooner, yeah, just a little bit sooner.

Speaker 1 20:37

Anything else what? But that you wish someone had warned you, just that, um it's hard to get the weight off after a day

Speaker 5 20:46

like seriously like I just had no idea, yeah I mean I was always 105 pounds. I used to call me olive oil, and then one day, the weight.

Speaker 1 20:58

Really I hated it because I always had hips this is a little skinny thing with hips. She was slim, fit.

Speaker 5 21:04

I had these hips because the kids used to tease me, the boys used to tease me. The same boys, boys, they loved it.

Speaker 3 21:10

You didn't know, I didn't know. Yeah, they loved it.

Speaker 5 21:13

So I was always 105 pounds. It's a little old thing, right. And then one day you wake up and this weight is here and you can't. I mean, I used to. I don't know if anybody remembers this used to be this stuff called weight on. Did you used to drink so you could gain weight? Like to gain weight?

Speaker 1 21:34

Like protein.

Speaker 4 21:35

It was like a protein, so I just always drink them to gain weight because I was so little.

Speaker 5 21:37

I wish you could give it back, I know right. Like nobody ever said this is going to happen at a certain age Make sure that you, you know, run or work out or do something. You just, I just assumed that I was going to be where I was girl forever You're still a hot girl.

Speaker 4 21:52

You see her cut her eyes at me.

Speaker 2 21:54

I'm still a hot girl. You're still a hot girl. It is harder.

Speaker 5 21:58

Still got these hips, yeah, but you know, I just wished that, you know somebody would have said.

Speaker 2 22:03

You know, this is called a fupa and all of that stuff.

Speaker 5 22:06

Like nobody told me any of this.

Financial Concerns & Retirement Planning

Speaker 1 22:09

It's like okay, gonna, I'm gonna steer you, steer you a little different direction. Look, don't, don't look at us, don't judge us. Mo, and it might just be me I know every woman is different, I know I know every woman's body is different, but you remember when you used to wet the whole bed, oh yeah when did that?

Speaker 2 22:31

stop when did that? I think it depends on the person. Honestly, he's still young.

Speaker 1 22:37

It depends on the person still messing with the women that still wet up the whole bed. When did that stop and what happened?

Speaker 2 22:43

to it right person have you?

Speaker 1 22:45

yeah, no, the right person will. But if you just looked at me and you could wet the floor.

Speaker 2 22:51

I can't waste it for everybody.

Speaker 1 22:53

What did you say? I can't waste it. I can't waste it, but also too, if you're not sexually active as often as you used to be.

Speaker 2 23:03

They also say, if you don't use it, you lose it, so you know I say well, run the draft.

Speaker 1 23:08

Yes, what did you say? What?

Speaker 3 23:10

did you say the well run the draft? That, yes, we said a well well run strap. That is gonna dig a little deeper, like what, what I?

Speaker 2 23:20

was like what, what happened to that? Yeah, like to that you swim, I know like I'm swimming it. Like what happened to that? Is it there? It's still there it's still there.

Speaker 1 23:29

Well, part of it. But that's also part of one reason why I say I need a therapist, because I got so much stuff to unpack. But I also didn't realize the impact that going through a health scare has on you like I'm and I hate to say this publicly, but it's true, I'm a little I have a little anxiety about actually having sex right now oh, that's fair considering everything that you've gone through you're talking about the estrogen, like, yes, like on your body, like, how are you?

Speaker 1 23:55

supposed to have, okay, another funny story so much. The last time that I did get some and it wasn't all that long ago I'd love to start out test to see if she still worked. I had a hot flash in the middle, but the funny thing was he felt it, that he was like what's going on. He probably loved that hot glass. First of all, it's already warm, thank you.

Speaker 3 24:20

It made it warmer, it turned up the heat, but no, it was hot.

Speaker 1 24:24

It wasn't warm. It was hot that he felt how hot my body got At the time. He was kind of inside, so that's a hot flash.

Speaker 3 24:40

She was like oh, my god like my body instantly went from this to this.

Speaker 1 24:50

Yeah, I was burning up and like we had to stop, give me a minute, my temperature come back down. But at the time we were in the act and he felt he literally felt it how hot I got internally.

Speaker 5 25:07

Okay, Trying to make sure this is clean.

Speaker 2 25:09

You definitely should.

Speaker 3 25:11

Trying to make sure this stays on the cleaver, that's a hot yes now you had the man like trying to comment

Speaker 1 25:23

can I try it out? It was more than just a flat. No, it was hot. It was hot because it scared him for a minute, like what is? Because sometimes you feel like it's going to come up and you'd be like, okay, come on. Let's get back down. Get it back down, but you don't know. But when it goes, there's no warning. It's like from zero to 100, instantly, and you're, and intimately, all intertwined and connected like that's the nicest way to say it and all of a sudden your body is at a thousand degrees.

Speaker 1 25:54

And he was just like no, ma'am, what is? That I was like I'm having a hot flash get off me I thought I could get through it. I thought I could get through it hot flash.

Weight Gain & Changing Bodies

Speaker 3 26:08

But yeah, sorry, I hate that for you yes, so I have a little anxiety about that's fair though it's ruining my life.

Speaker 1 26:19

I need estrogen.

Speaker 2 26:21

Yeah, that's coming soon baby soon, yes, I need estrogen.

Speaker 5 26:25

I know we have to wrap up, but I think the myth that we're older and so we don't work, or whatever the case may be, that is truly a myth, because we always I mean, they say at 40, that's when we hit our sexual peak.

Speaker 1 26:39

I truly believe that. I think I did too.

Speaker 5 26:41

I truly believe that and I think we've all experienced it. Experience it, but the the older you get to me, um, when that crib is gone and that playpen is put in, it just gets you. You don't have to worry about things.

Speaker 4 26:59

I just think it makes it easier better more open for you to play no, no, she lost me too.

Speaker 5 27:05

I was like I'm sorry, you usually your baby oh yeah, oh yeah, play pin you're playing I was lost. So, yeah, so, um, I you know, I just think that it's all mind over matter. Okay, it's what you said. If you don't use it, you lose it.

Speaker 1 27:24

But, um, you know so does sex get better than when you get older? I think so, I absolutely think so.

Speaker 5 27:33

Yeah, we're not just doing a mister thing. You know the things that you don't know you turn.

Speaker 2 27:38

Put your leg up there, grab your ankles.

Speaker 3 27:41

No, I'm kidding.

Speaker 5 27:43

No you're not. No, you're not.

Speaker 4 27:47

You're not Unfiltered? No, I think it does, because you said you know you.

Speaker 5 27:52

You've gotten to a point where you know your body, you know what you like, you know what you don't want and you're to me, I think it is more enjoyable and you can verbalize what you like, what you don't like, the things that when you're younger you don't know, you just take it, you have a condition to just be like well, whatever they want, I don't know.

Speaker 1 28:08

And then I take it you kind of condition to just be like, well, whatever they want. I don't know, I was never like that. Sex was never like that for me.

Speaker 5 28:12

Well, no, it may not be like that for you. What I'm saying is that's what girls are basically taught, for the most part Not because, you were, not because you were.

Speaker 3 28:19

What did he.

Speaker 5 28:21

My mom was a bit different.

Speaker 2 28:22

That goes to say my, I don't think I was ever like that. Yeah, no, I'd be like you. Better put it on your face.

Speaker 5 28:40

I had a mom who was very free when I say free. I mean, I love that. That's one of the things I can truly say I loved about my mom. She was free, so she didn't get caught up in the things that you're supposed to do. What she wanted, she got, she took, whatever the case may be. But for the most part, girls are conditioned to please the guy wherever he want. And we don't learn, we really don't.

Speaker 4 29:04

We're not taught you the true meaning of an orgasm and you feeling good and telling people what you want, right.

Speaker 5 29:11

And so we a lot, of, a lot of girls think they're out here doing something because they can hum. But why did I do the hump? I know For real, for real. The older you get, you know you come into the space of your own and you can truly tell them what you want, what you like or what you don't want, what you don't like or buy because this ain't going to work. You know you get to that point space in your life. So yeah, honey, an older woman.

Sex Lives in Midlife

Speaker 1 29:43

That's why they run into us. Well, we did ask a quick question to our people because I just remembered I had one on our over here. Mr Mo, jump over there for us and hit that. That first one, all the way at the top, Asked was sex better now that you get older?

Speaker 4 30:01

Hello, my name is Tamika. I'm calling from Atlanta. So the question is does sex get better with age? I'm early 40s. So the question is does sex get better with age? I'm early 40s and I guess with me it just depends on the person and how I'm feeling at that moment, if that makes sense, because I know what I want and I know what I don't want, and I know if I'm dealing with someone that's older, you might want a little more. If it's someone younger, then hey, I ain't looking for nothing too much. So I guess it's not the age If it gets better with age. To me it depends on the person that's very true.

Speaker 1 30:41

Yeah, I think it's just a combination of things.

Speaker 5 30:45

It's a combination, but my personal opinion, when you age, things are always, should always get better, because it's the wisdom that comes with yeah, yeah, I think it is, because it's more than just the physical.

Speaker 1 30:57

It is, it's more than just the physical, it's okay, all right. Well, anything else you wish somebody had warned y'all about, that's it life gets better?

Speaker 2 31:06

yes, it does get better it does it gets better.

Speaker 1 31:08

it gets harder sometimes, but it gets better. Yes, it does get better. It does it gets better.

Speaker 2 31:11

It gets harder sometimes, but it gets better, but it gets easier in other ways. Yeah, it's this balance.

Speaker 5 31:17

Think about the things you used to worry about when you were younger. Yeah, that now you don't even remember, but it was such a worry back then. So it does, it gets better.

Speaker 1 31:31

It's just embracing it and being happy with where you are. Yeah, it's better, kids. Just don't let stephanie sneeze. Make sure you like, follow and subscribe to timeless and unfiltered and I'm legra. I'm stephanie I'm charise and I'm ivania and we're gonna. And I'm Lycra, I'm Steph and I'm Cherise and I'm Evanya and we're going to keep on spilling this tea. Y'all better come on back over here. We're going to keep spilling the tea on Midlife. One laugh at a time. All right, like us, follow us, subscribe to us, come get us.

Speaker 2 32:04

Uh-oh All right, eddie, y'all she hot and ready. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.